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Look at other people reading without feeling creepy!

Sunday, June 17, 2012

So far on this Sunday, I have washed one load of laundry because I had NO PANTS LEFT other than Pajama Jeans, which I came very close to wearing to work on Friday. I also made a grilled cheese sandwich, Googled "Florida Keys vacation" and gave some very serious thought to taking a shower. I'M ON A ROLL, Y'ALL.

It's a good day to get sucked down a blog rabbit hole, is what I'm saying, and I have just the one for you.

My agent, Rachel, posted this on the DGLM blog not too long ago. It's called Underground New York Public Library, and it's basically a blog full of pictures of people reading on the subway. If it sounds boring, it's not. It's the ultimate voyeuristic thing. Like, come on. You know you look at people in Target to see what's in their baskets, and you totally judge them and invent hilarious stories if they have, like, six sticks of butter, a pair of tube socks and a motorcycle magazine. This is the same thing, only fancier!

After looking at these pictures I feel inferior as usual, like I should probably be reading much more Murakami or something. I'd totally be that person they caught reading, "50 WAYS TO TURN YOUR OLD PANTYHOSE INTO LAMPSHADES."

 
Serial killers love this kind of decorating.










Which is why I read on a Kindle.

Happy Sunday, lazies!

OBITCHUARY, Chapter 10

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

May was a total fail.

I mean, there were no huge tragedies or dramas or home explosions, but there were just a series of first world concerns that kept evaporating or not working out or farting to disappointing conclusion. I. Am. Over. May.

June, though! June is very different. June is my birthday month (big 29 -- gotta start working on my pre-30 bucket list). I'm looking toward June with renewed vigor and verve, with an unfailing positive outlook on life, with a fresh commitment to my artistic endeavors. Watch out June, you're mine!

With that, I give you June's first installment of Obitchuary, Chapter 10.  It's a pretty short chapter, and in it, Penny stays up late like a madwoman Googling the guy she likes. NOT THAT ANY OF US HAVE EVER DONE THAT BEFORE, RIGHT LADIES? Watch to learn what she finds out about him. It ain't pretty, I'll just say that.

You might notice a tuft of brown fur wiggling occasionally in the background. That is Stuart, who apparently wanted to help me grab June by the horns. Thank you, Stu, for your assistance. Most kind.

Catch up on your chapters here and don't forget to subscribe on YouTube! And, ooh, hey, check out this screen grab. I call it, "Gag me with a spoon, cha."

Obitchuary, Chapter 10